This is my new blog. My old blog can be read on MySpace.com. That blog was mostly about my wannabe sniper neighbor and fake movie spoilers. This blog will be mostly about, but not limited to, craft beer, annoying behavior that I think we can all agree on, and comedy. This blog may contain harsh language and adult content. People with no sense of humor should stop reading now.
As I write this, I am zero pints in, and was sent home from my "day" job because the supervisor told me that "we" need to make our numbers. I am not sure what exactly he has been doing, but I have been applying force over distance at a constant rate for multiple hours at a time. The job helps pay bills between stand-up gigs and requires about a 3rd grade education and the ability to lift 70 lbs. No big deal about being laid off today, though. The sun hasn't risen, and the streets are silent. Perfect time to start another blog. I have been meaning to do this for a while.
The cast of characters at my job are as follows:
The Know It All who's been in the game eight years.
The Floater who is an expert in walking around BETWEEN tasks appearing to be busy.
The Topper. He has a personal experience that beats yours every time.
The Walmart Greeter works here just to socialize with the youngsters like myself.
The Lazy Bitch.
The Idiot wears shorts everyday even if it is below freezing.
The Supervisor who has never said my name.
The Lingerer who's shift ended an hour ago.
These characters make up the cast of "Early Morning Warehouse," the all too real story of my life. Today's episode: "Laid Off."
I clock in 10 minutes early, report to my usual post and begin prepping my work area. The shift officially begins and I am one of less than five workers ready to start on time. Just as today's labor begins, The Supervisor strolls in, looks directly at me and says, "Go home." The End.
Tune in next time when The Lazy Bitch says, "Do I have to carry this over there?" on "Early Morning Warehouse!"